Friday, October 12, 2007

Eating for Two

This is my pitch for a situation comedy or "sitcom." I am going to tell the story as if I already saw the pilot, instead of stage directions:

A Large bearded man, with a bush of hair on his head is driving down a residential street, holding the wheel with one hand he takes off his glasses to clean some smudge of impurity off of them. All of sudden, we hear a dull thud followed by a body rolling and flopping onto the hood of the hero's car.

The driver jumps out of his ruined car to see what has happened- there on the hood of his car, the pedestrian he has hit beckons him close.

-"Oh my god! Are you ok?" our hero stammers.
-"I'm dying..." the stranger softly moans.
-"Wait, I'll get help..."
-"There's not much time, just come closer..."
-"I am so, sorry, what there anything..." for me..."
-"eat... what?"
-"Eat for me."
-"Like, have your last meal? What do you want me to eat?
-"Everything, I want you to eat for me whenever you eat...Whenever you eat a meal or snack, eat some for me, as if I was there."
-"I don't understand...what, why.."
-"That's not important, just.. eat.."

(Cut to a scene a month later.)

-The hero is sitting in his kitchen alternatively eating out of two bowls of cereal when he notices the time and dashes out the door. He sits down in class, and the girl next to him offers him a piece of gum.
_"Do you have another piece?"
-"Oh, yeah!" she says sweetly, and places a piece in her own mouth.
-"No, I meant, another one for me."
-"No, those were my last two pieces..."
-"That's ok," handing the gum back.
-"Wait, why do you need two pieces? Do you want half of mine?"
-"I'm sorry that's is not the way it works..."

(Cue music, and fade out of episode one.)